The ‘What if?’ game.
You must know it. We all like to play it. I primarily like to use it to stay comfortable.
And packing and moving brings it to an Olympic level.
It’s through playing this game that I now have more clothes than I can wear and more stuff than I want or need.
Its through playing this game that I have things I ‘can’t bear to part with’ that I haven’t used in years and even forgot I had.
I have enough t-shirts to wear a different one every day of the month. After giving dozens away. Multiple times. But what if I get rid of that one from that time and then miss it? Or what if I never think of it again?
I forgot about half my clothes until I found them in storage last week. But what if one day I go to that one thing with those people during that time of year when it is that weather? Or the more probable, what if it sits in my closet for the next 4 years like it has for the last 4?
If you don’t do the same thing, please tell me the way out.
What-if’s can rule your life if you let them, and I wish I could say I only played the what if game with clothes and possessions. However that would be far from truth. I can easily justify my way to ‘the best decision’ with a few good what-ifs. Like what if its awkward? Lonely? Uncomfortable? Too hard? Too easy? What if I fail? Or what if I succeed? What if its not safe? Not fun? Not challenging?
What if its not? Shall I risk all of those in one… or shall I risk missing out on what might be the most important decision of my life.
What if its all of them? Is it worth it?
This is where I should probably have some solution or wise revelation. But I don’t think I do except to ask God. Life is more comfortable when it is ‘safe.’ And you can always find justification to keep it that way. Just as you can find justification for risk that has no purpose: foolishness. Or to take a risk with great purpose. Life doesn’t fit in a grid. And there isn’t a simple solution. The What-if game can keep us in a world of safety and comfort apart from who we are created to be… or it can lead us into the greatest adventure of our lives. It all depends on which what-ifs you lend value to.
Right now my what-ifs are very logical: what-if I have to move all this stuff halfway across the country? Oh wait, I do.